And so it is done!

For over two years now, coming close to three- we've been waiting on a dream.

Waiting... wondering... pondering... sometimes struggling... usually believing.

We have wanted to sell our home.

We've wrestled with our dream over and over.  At first it started with an "I gotta get outa here" feeling.  I didn't grow up with neighbours, and then I acquired five very close neighbours and one that is there a couple of mornings a week.

I felt like I lived in a fishbowl.

We've done circles over and over about the dream, whether it is the 'right' thing to do, whether we should... having the "maybe we should stay, work hard, pay the mortgage, do a few jobs on the place and see how we go"

We bought in the very month that the housing market peaked in 2007.  It was an absolute we would lose money.  This was painful on a young couple who have worked very, very hard to pay as much of our mortgage as we physically could over the 5.5 years we have had it.  Not to mention the accountant I married.

No matter what the struggles, questions or musings, one thing never left - the desire to sell our home.

Over the course of time we have had it privately on the market, then with an agent, then moved out for nine months and had a tenant, then moved back and re-listed with an agent.

We started off incredibly hopeful, we had people through and it got to the point where some came for a second look and were heading to the bank.  We never heard back from them.  We had open homes, and for many of them no one would turn up.

Picture this... turning my family upside down spending all of Saturday cleaning frantically to have the place immaculate.  Chasing the kids around Sunday morning picking up every loose crumb, every strayed toy, pushing them out the house to church so that it remained tidy... arriving home full of anticipation to a card that said "there was no one through today" - week after week after week.

Still, we moved out to house-sit my parent's in laws house and were there for nine months of 2012.  We shifted back both with agreeance that we want to sell, and re-listed.  We had people through our open homes, but there was always a reason they weren't interested.  Sometimes there was no one through.  Then there was weeks of nothing.  Deadness.

This time there was much less effort on my part.  Inintially I was heavily pregnant, then began having complications.  So the house was tidy but not immaculate.  Then I had bubba so there were weeks of open homes for a house that was 'average' tidyness with me having nothing to do with it.

About three weeks ago, our neighbour listed her house on the market.  At first I was a bit resentful.  It was a much higher price than ours and we have been hanging out for this for so long.  Then I felt like God spoke to me and said "pray that she sells her house."  Initially I was surprised, taken aback, pray someone else, right next door, sells their house!? That's ridiculous.  But then I just felt like it was the right thing to do and so I whole-heartedly prayed she would sell her house quickly, just like she wanted to.

She had one open home and then had a contract on the house.  My response was joy.  Really, hey - God answered my prayer - cool for her.  But there was a little ache of - what about me God!!?

Him and I have had a monologue going on about our house for quite a while now.  About once a week I would have a bit of a melt down to Him about it.  I think He got fed up, cause then He just said "you can sell your house and buy another anyday, but if you wait, you will get my best" - I figured that was a "you're wearing me out - shuuush already!!"

He has told me many times - even right at the start "it is already done".  Then "I will do it soon" - what is His soon anyway!?  then just "I will sell your house".  Every time I asked, it was the same response.  In the natural, this has seemed completely impossible.  Smack in a recession, people not wanting to buy, non-committal viewers and a funny shaped house - nothing much in our favour.

Anyway, I was visiting my grandmother and we were discussing my home and I just confessed that I was so downhearted.  My uncle suggested that we should take it off the market and in six months re-list it higher.  My instant internal response was "NO! that is not what we want".  We had already lowered our price to $30k les than we paid for the house.

I came home and felt desperately flat.  It was the worst day in the entire process.  To me, it just seemed I had come to the point of our circumstances being the exact opposite of our dream.  We have three kids, in quite a small home.  We LOVE hosting people, we are musicians, we struggle to do things we love because our kids sleep directly above our living quarters and hear every ounce of noise.

I reminded myself there are people in smaller homes with larger families, and was greatful for what I have, but my heart was sinking.

I cried out to Him - God, please, if you are going to sell our home like I feel you have promised, please do something today outside of me and myself!  Please show me in some other way that you are going to do it, please, please.

Within an hour the phone rang.  Our agent.  Down the road with an investor who initially didn't want to look at our house, but she had persuaded to come in and view.  Could she come RIGHT NOW!?  Anyone who has one child, let alone three (including a small baby and a toddler) would know that turning up at a family home out of the blue means you would likely find a bit of a mess.  But this, a potential buyer - aaah!  I said yes of course.

Thankfully the house wasn't too bad, there were toys everywhere an overloaded nappy bin in the baby's room and our room was a pigstye, but still, the lady said it wasn't messy.

She was really kind.

I knew at this point that His promise was true, He was going to sell our house, His way, His time and we just had to rest and wait.

Later, the phone rang again, can we have a 'second view' please - on Monday.  HECK yes!

Mowed lawns, finished garden, finished projects, replaced curtains kids had ripped, did washing, cleaned rooms, checked cupboards, tidied house, scrubbed bathroom, vacuum cleaned, made beds and out we were...

She offerred that night.

We declined, wanting a better price. I felt to go with what my man suggested, I doubted so bad and wanting to take the offer and run, but I knew what I was to do. It was a little test, my hubby said if this was God's answer to our need then the lady will go up by 5k. If she did not, we were to refuse her offer.  She did.  This is a cash offer, instant unconditional, solely dependent on a brief builders inspection to ensure there was no large jobs to be done.  The builders came that afternoon and it was all signed and sealed... and done.  Tears flowed.

Sparkling beverages, icecream and caramel sauce all flowed.  We are overjoyed.  Our Father has kept His promise to us and in a very, very short swift move of His hand - took it from impossible to done.

I cannot begin to explain what it is to have such a major battle won.  This has been a real dream for us for a long time.  We have no idea what is next, but we know we are in the right place.

So more than this story, here is what I really wanted to say....

I know for sure - what happened in my heart between the initial desire to sell our house, and the actual sale is far more important than the promise fulfilled.

I had let the lack of seeing the fulfillment of this dream become an excuse not to pursue other dreams.  I had a wrong attitude about my house, which was originally a great thing that the Lord did for us in helping us get it in the first place.  I had been ungreatful and sometimes, I had despised it.

When we moved out, we both became so greatful for our home.  Our warm, loving home with our colour schemes and our deck in the sun and all the beautiful things we had worked so hard to do.  We longed to be back.  And since we have been back, we have been greatful.  We have tried to be thankful for it everyday, thankful for our neighbours and all the little things.  I would even thank God that it is small enough for me to clean completely in half to a full day - a real good clean, because bigger houses are much more work.

We realised that we had found excuses to not pursue other things - like hosting people regularly and being a blessing to others.  I had this sense that we needed to "occupy until He comes" - to pursue our other dreams despite our situation - and know that if we focussed on His Kingdom, He will bring the other things to pass.

My attitude is different.  I am no longer on the escape to fulfill my selfish needs to have a bigger and/or better home.  Now it is all about what I am able to do with what He has put in my hand.  If I have more in my hand I am able to do more.

I just wanted to write this as a testimony to the faithfulness of God.  I have journalled this process and as I read back I discover that it has been just as He said it would. 

Yes, we have lost a lot of money - but He is abounding in faithfulness and goodness and in light of who He is and what He is doing, the money doesn't matter.

He doesn't save us from our ways, He just has higher ways.  The collision of our ways with His is where we face the choice of who's way it will be.  He will always have His in the end.

Release blessing on other people who are doing what you want or living their dreams.  Life's not a competetion, we need every piece of the puzzle, every person to live their dreams.

I truly believe that this year is a year where we as a people have stepped into a season of fulfillment.  We have closed a chapter on many things and turned to a new page, almost like a brand new book.

We are beginnng to see promises and dreams fulfilled - some we have held dear for many years.  Included in this are some things which we thought were a long way off - something for much, much later in life - but time is of the essence and in this He is heaping time upon time as He prepares His people for great and glorious things.  We must actively cease the day and live in pursuit of the things we hold dear, not hoping for them for "someday" but living like they are possibilities any day now.

All I can say on this day is, hold onto your dreams.  When the time is right He will release them to you completely, wholly and fully and with great haste.  And you will marvel at His wonder.  He is so good.